Wednesday, September 2, 2009
I wish I could read minds. I have wished that so many times over the years, but I am finally convinced that the benefits would outweigh the costs-- at least mostly. Mind reading would be entirely positive if I had the option of turning it on and off at will. I can't even read my own mind right now though, there is just too much going on. The transition to college, being alone, living alone. The constant inner battle to remain ever positive and hopeful when I feel so isolated. Feeling like I can only rarely genuinely connect with people on any level. I'm not being elitist, I don't think I am different or better or any of that trite nonsense, I just find it hard to find people that seem to understand where I am coming from on a fundamental level. I want to find someone I can say anything to. I want to find someone that I can be myself around entirely, and not doubt for a second that they aren't judging me poorly. I want it to be simple. I want to feel secure and content.